Lost in Lost

Now that I am a lady of leisure (and how!) I find I have become once again addicted to the following shows with diminishing returns: Gossip Girl, The Office and Lost.

Let's start with Lost (though I'd like to quickly say that if Blair and Chuck don't make it soon or if Pam and Jim don't break up in the foreseeable future--come on they're so dumpy, it's like watching grits congeal with the two of those sadsacks, and what's with them trying to make her hot? She was way better as the underappreciated frump. Also, fire Kevin after the Hilary Swank argument. That was awful. I demand more Creed. The Creed and Stanley Hour, perhaps).

So, I get it. Time travel. Hey, if the island is just magic then any rules apply! You jerk writers. You expect me to forget everything that happened before then? As if time travel is the catch-all that makes everything else make sense? I mean I like it as a plot line but where does that fit in with drug smuggling, psychological experiments, Whitmore's bloodlust to turn the place into some sort of themepark and all the rest?

Okay so let's just discount the four-toed statue (is anyone going to explain this??), the smoke monster, the polar bears, the people that lived on the island first (the other others?) and everything else. Unfair, but okay. Clearly the writers were just given carte blanche and mushroom tea for the first four years of this. But now, that we are back on ground, can we please address where Walt is, why Jack can't make it with Kate and how unfair it is for him to say that she's not Aaron's mom (um dude, birthing and abandoning a kid does not a mother make, how about the woman who saved him at his mother's behest and raised him for three years?? What a jerk! I want to like him but sheeesh) and why Hurley still hasn't lost any weight? I mean, we laughed about it a while but come on. And do you even know that that dude is dating some hottie in real life? Ugly dudes and hot women go together like peanut butter and jelly. So unfair.

Also why is it that I am attracted to Sayid? He is gross and I love it. Oooh all that assassin stuff. And also why is Desmond always dressed like a foppish dandy in rose-colored glasses and silk scarves? So many questions, so few answers. Lost. You bastard. Why can't I quit you.