Sunday, March 27, 2011

I'm Doing A Cleanse

Having some perspective...nearly four weeks without talking to the ex, seeing the end of the book, wondering what to do when the lease ends, thinking about taking a 2 month jaunt to Southeast Asia before I turn 30, and all that...I went and did something stupid.

I'm always doing something stupid. It's part of being an enthusiast.

This time the dumb idea is I'm doing a juice cleans. Juice, no food, no alcohol, no caffeine, no anything for three-five days, vegan leading up and vegan leading out. I've been going to yoga a lot more now, and I'm starting to buy into some of this yoga-ness. Eating vegan was a change that made things interesting, and it's cool to see my discipline as other people are eating delicious things in front of me, like cookies and lobster sandwiches.

Apparently you reach spiritual clarity by day three. I think that you are delirious from not eating by then and start to think the meaning of life is moon beams. That will certainly be the fun part.

I'm at 3 PM on day two, and I'm feeling neutral. People have headaches and irritability and runny noses on this, but I don't at all...except I just feel a little bored. I didn't realize how many of my weekend plans were around food and drink consumption. Brunch plans, coffee plans, drink plans. It's been an interesting and mildly boring weekend all at once. I didn't want to cleanse during the week and be confused at work, and then exhausted when I worked out, so I figured the weekend was good.

Turns out any time for a cleanse blows.

Luckily I've got magazines, movies, errands, and lots of texting. Drinking water when at bars. Watching hours of Top Chef and wondering what everything tastes like. Googling pictures of bacon. No biggie.

It's too cold to do what I want that doesn't relate to food, which is walk to Greenpoint to the bike store and see if that Surly is still there. Or even drop by the coffee shop and order water and sit there and read my Southeast Asia On A Budget Book and flirt with the barista with the neck tattoo.

So I'm stuck in my apartment, and food's on my brain.

Like I'm missing the act of chewing. Even thinking about it now is getting me riled up. Chewing! When has that excited anyone?

I don't want to write, I don't want to clean.

I want to go have a hamburger with a friend. No, actually, scratch the friend. If I ate in front of them the way that I want to eat right now, they would no longer want to be my friend.

Vegan in, vegan out. Spiritual clarity. Delirium.

Peace and love to all mankind.

And bacon to those who wait.