Things I heard myself saying while interacting with those of the opposite sex:
"Wait, you're an art-school dropout who lives in Williamsburg? Wait, hold on, let me get my camera, my grandkids are never gonna believe this."
Waits a beat as would-be suitor stomps off.
"So you don't want to buy me a drink anymore?"
I am good at dating, people. Really good. One of these days I'm going to do it.