Monday, June 30, 2008

Panty Ripper Quote of the Day

There is a drink in Belize called the Panty Ripper. It is amazing, potent, always in great supply. Our sailing trip ended with the first mate hilariously making us some instead of driving the boat properly. He says we have to say it "PANTIE RIPPAH". That is all. Well also, this...

Two in the morning we awake on the deserted island to find that one of us is not in the tent. No, one of us is not in the tent at all.

I take a walk around the water; there are no floating bodies. There is also no electricity. I tear my foot on some rocks and then decide if she's dead, well, there's nothing that I can do. And then, the following morning:

Figure appears hangdoggedly walking in the distance towards us...

Me, shouting: Walk of shame!

REDACTED: Yeah, yeah, I slept on the boat.

Me: Uh huh. So...who was it?

REDACTED, laughing: Oh Captain, my Captain!

Me, laughing: Well?

REDACTED: Well...what?

Me (clearing throat): I think we deserve to know how big his mast is.

Panty Ripper indeed. Also for the rest of the sailing trip I was allowed to call the captain "Papasito".


Anonymous said...

Pretty K, I miss you! Signed on today to see if you were posting while away and was so thrilled to see that you are!
Haven't picked up the MS yet (have too many piles to read) but will have it read long before you return, promise. Hugs to you and talk soon!
xoxox SB

debo said...

Poor Cap'n. Wait, he's a ship boat captain in Belize? Poor everyone else.

Ani Smith said...

Ha. You're too funny.

Glad to see you're keeping locals on their toes.

Anonymous said...


Lets name more drinks after rape euphemisms.

Anyone want a sip of my Bleeding Asshole?

Anonymous said...

Bleeding Asshole's are so over.

Fifteen Years of Therapy are where it's at.

I get mine with a lime.