Monday, June 11, 2007

It Ain't Easy Being Cheesy

I’m a cheese-head today. Not quite Wisconsin, but definitely bright-eyed and face-splitting grins.

While things don’t necessarily happen well these days (a death in the family; a death of a future) they also don’t just happen around me—I refuse to believe that they do. This morning, because of this decision of happy denial, I feel invigorated, effervescent, felted with hope…for some odd reason, this creates a fantasy where I am planted back into a romantic 17th century where the realities of plumbing and personal hygiene are gladly glossed over for the narrative of tonics, weird herbs, and cycles of the moon which chart the course we take and those we don’t. Old books written in olde English with maps of even older woods. Flowing curtains and stone walls. Curses and enchantment at the stroke of a wand.

The fairy that’s been following me for a week finally poured an elixir into my ear as I slept…or more likely, it was the first good night of over-sleep I’ve had in a while (ten hours will do wonders, I’m a believer).

I have a say in my own life, and when it comes down to it, that’s the only say that matters.

How can it be that naysayers who don’t even know the real me are at the helm, driving me into the perfect storm instead of calm shores of coconut drinks and sand-dusted heels? That’s an illusion, and not a helpful one. The only control we have is over ourselves, how we act and react, who we treat well and the happiness we emit. There is never a need for sadness, badness, to be inflicted upon situations which can be avoided or changed into good, floating memories and futures. I’ll keep this in mind, if I can keep anything at all. There is a being in charge, one who makes it good or bad at any given time, and it of course, is us.

What is helpful today is to be grateful for this life, no matter what emotion it brings, I am glad it brings any.

I have so much love to give and it’s time I gave it to someone else…maybe myself for once…wow, this is the cheesiest I’ve felt in a long time. Florid prose and stupid giggling today; certain embarrassment later…


Anonymous said...

its fun to be cheezy! this post made me happy.

Adrienne said...

I don't think its cheesy, more optimistic and a little optimism never hurt anyone. Go on, be happy, be hopeful, you never know where it may take you!

C-47 said...

im jumping out of a perfectly good plane at two miles up today. wish me luck.