There are good dates and then there are bad dates. I present to you the following evidence…
Good dates may or may not include the following:
-shared sushi
-teak décor
-lip gloss re-applications
-one too many “Ginger Smash” cocktails
-hysterically laughing at a terrible joke I made
-skateboarding
-a giant, and I mean GIANT, waiter
-the worst movie either of us has ever seen
-a dangerous cab ride that included the running of red lights and possibly hitting a garbage can
Bad dates may or may not include the following:
-forced salsa dancing
-as an addendum to the first item; aggressively swiveling male hips in any form
-his “forgetting” to bring any cash at all
-his cash issue expressed mere moments after he tells me he’s buying a condo in L.A.
-holding my bag hostage until I “give him a kiss”
-breaking said bag when I nervously laugh off the uncomfortable demand
-sweating, inexplicably, when the wine comes
-asking to hold my hand yet making me hold his coat all night
I pray to the dating gods that I get more from Column A this weekend than from Column B…you guys owe me after Mr. His Name Shall Not Be Mentioned, No, Not Ever Again.
Seriously, come on!
Good dates may or may not include the following:
-shared sushi
-teak décor
-lip gloss re-applications
-one too many “Ginger Smash” cocktails
-hysterically laughing at a terrible joke I made
-skateboarding
-a giant, and I mean GIANT, waiter
-the worst movie either of us has ever seen
-a dangerous cab ride that included the running of red lights and possibly hitting a garbage can
Bad dates may or may not include the following:
-forced salsa dancing
-as an addendum to the first item; aggressively swiveling male hips in any form
-his “forgetting” to bring any cash at all
-his cash issue expressed mere moments after he tells me he’s buying a condo in L.A.
-holding my bag hostage until I “give him a kiss”
-breaking said bag when I nervously laugh off the uncomfortable demand
-sweating, inexplicably, when the wine comes
-asking to hold my hand yet making me hold his coat all night
I pray to the dating gods that I get more from Column A this weekend than from Column B…you guys owe me after Mr. His Name Shall Not Be Mentioned, No, Not Ever Again.
Seriously, come on!
8 comments:
Ew Ew Ew. I hope you dumped that guy hard.
but you're one frog closer to your prince m'dear!
Incredulous.
ugh, i'm sorry!
one thing i've learned the hard way from crazy bad dates - if you're getting clear signals it's not going anywhere, leave. tell the truth, that you just aren't feeling "it", make up an excuse, call a freind in the bathroom and have her call you 5 minutes later saying she locked herself out of her apt and you have her spares (i've used that one), whatever, but its not rude, or not any more rude, anyway, then the hijinks you listed in the mr B column. good luck!
sushi would be a deal MAKER for me!
sweat in any form is not ok with me. blech.
Thank God I never have to date agaion. I couldn't handle the game ...
wow... just... wow
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