Saturday, May 30, 2009

Baby Boy Boden! (Cheesy Girl Post)

My wonderful friend Colleeeeeen (from college) and her husband Read (ditto) just welcomed into this world a baby boy! As their long-distance supporter (I'm glad I bought the semi-unisex baby gift because they waited to find out if their baby was a boy or girl and now there is absolutely no excuse--I must go visit them pronto) I am posting the pics they sent everyone here. Yay Boden!

It's enough to make the most hardened semi-employed writer with three roommates go "Awwww." Also, my God are they big when they come out. I have a really gross baby question that I just asked my other preggers friend Selly: when the baby comes out, he or she breathes air for the first time, so I was wondering if the baby peed for the first time after coming out, and if not, does the baby pee inside you? That can't be right! But there are so many fascinating and insane things that happen to your body and the baby's during the whole process that I don't even know how idiotic my question is. Can someone tell me?

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Friends with an Ex, Part Deux

So there was a time on this blog when I asked, can you be friends with an ex? The discussion got good and then I got conflicted. All my exes (save one who flat-out refuses to talk to me because he thinks that talking to me will break up his engagement--come on I'm not that evil/fascinating/rich for that to even be a consideration! Think about it, Person Who Hates Me) want to be/have wanted to be friends at some point.

Methinks there is an ulterior motive sometimes. Others, I can't say. When you break up with someone (or someone breaks up with you) isn't one person basically saying to the other person "I deem you unworthy as of this moment" and shouldn't both parties just straight disappear forever? Won't you always be rehashing old times and pissing off your current boyfriend/girlfriend? What is the point unless you are going to try it again, and btw, don't ever try it again if you broke up because that trust can never come back, right?

I am full of questions tonight after an ex called long-distance because of a song 'that reminded me of him' and I sort of asked all these questions inappropriately. I sort of had a grandstanding speech when the guy was just trying to tell me he missed me. I sort of said, "We're fake friends, not real friends! I want real friends and we can never be real friends!" I got hung up on. I don't recommend following in my path. It feels crappy.

But crappy or not, is it true? Or am I clinging to some antiquated idea of what friends are and affixing myself to the pain of our relationship which ended years ago! Will I forever be the brat who can't let bygones be bygones?

I'm dying to know...

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Someone Tell Me...

1. How I've gotten to the 21st of May with only 4 blog posts? See this is the strange thing about not working in an office. With all the free time to write, I push and push it off! Just like I said that I would explore all these parts of the city that I never have before since I had the luxury of doing it on a weekday and working instead on the weekend. You think I've done it? Yeah, well you're right, I haven't.

2. If you've ever gone anywhere by cashing in miles on an airplane and if it was the worst trip of your life. I've had the same US AIRWAYS Visa (yes, everyone calm down, I have such a pimp card right? It was my first credit card and I was 17!) for ten years and it's finally amassed an amount of miles that I could use to go to Hawaii (well another $2500 to spend on it to go I think). Now I'm thinking, once I hit my limit, I'll have to take fourteen planes to get there right? On a side note, is US Airways even a airline any more?

3. Where the good salads are that aren't in midtown. Now that I "work" from "home" I can't get a salad the way I used to. And sometimes, I want one. And making one seems like it makes less sense since my fridge is teeny and my wallet is empty.

4. What shows you DVR. I got really overexcited and now the TV is full of 20/20 and 30 Rock and nothing else (I kind of think the Office stinks these days, I know I know, but I want Jim and Pam to break up. Am I the only one? Barf them! I liked their pining, not their whining). Now that we're about to go into TV no-man's-land (the summer) I think I need a cache of good watching and I don't know where to go.

5. What you're doing on your summer vacation. If you've ever been to Cambodia. If you have a fun idea for a day trip outside the city. Or in your own town. As I ponder what pictures are appropriate to show and a story about San Antonio (have you been here? Holy CRAP you would not believe how weirdly strange, cool and scary it was!)...

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Anybody been to Austin?

Bake ooey, gooey brownie bites that are so soft and rich they are practically fudge, check.

Rewrite short story to appeal to liberal white guilt more in the hopes that it will get published, check.

Forget to do laundry, check.

Watch the Monorail episode of the Simpsons, check.

Forget to write a chapter of the children's book, remember that I made the brownies for them, feel better, check.

Start to incorporate running into work-out routine. Gain four pounds but lose three percentage points of body fat and call it a wash. Eye brownies, check.

Celebrate Mother's Day late and give her a shout-out on my blog for being so fantastic and supportive (you too Dad!), check.

Make itinerary for anything to do in Austin as I am going there tomorrow. Whoops.

Anybody been to Austin? Is there anything I must do, must not do? Any bar I must dance on, drink I must chug, shop I must buy shoes in, park I must lie down in?

Anything would be so helpful...hooray!

Friday, May 08, 2009


It's time for some good news on the writing front, and here it is, from Dave King, one of the best editors in the entire world!

WHAT WORKS: Oh, nearly everything, but perhaps this sums it up best: I’m a middle-aged editor living in the Massachusetts countryside, where most of my social life takes place at either the library, the local hardware store, or the town dump. (Actually, the Ashfield town dump is probably not what you’d imagine.) I was still drawn in by the coming-of-age story of a young woman who moves among the upper echelons of Manhattan’s monied wastrels.

Of course, she moves in other circles as well, and one of the things that drew me in was your near-perfect pitch for character creation. Becks, the Ruffians, Connor and Kay, Alfred, even minor characters like Stewart and Blaine are all beautifully, clearly developed. And likable, which is difficult to do with the more shallow, self-centered characters like Becks or Kyle. (You do a very good poor little rich girl.) The relationship between A. and her mother – especially the scene on the way home after A. hits the deer – was beautifully done, as was the love scene between A. and Connor or the scene between A. and Kay in the amusement park.

Then there’s A. herself. From the start, you’ve captured (at least as far as this middle-aged, Massachusetts editor can tell) the fear, the lost hopelessness, the confusion of a young girl’s coming of age. You’ve also resisted the temptation to simply spin generic banalities about growing up and becoming an individual. The longstanding tension between A. and her mother, the way their relationship revolves around money, the secrets her mother has been harboring all of her life, all give concreteness and reality to A.’s transition into maturity.

There are a lot of little strengths as well. You manage your plot exceptionally well for someone writing such a character-driven story. Both the news (SPOILERS THAT I'VE TAKEN OUT!) well-crafted surprises, and you keep the tension up until the end. Your descriptions are vivid and visceral, with some very nicely turned phrases (“Beck’s father was a boldfaced name,” for instance). Your dialogue is crisp and feels authentic.

In short, you have written a remarkably strong novel.

Yaaaay! No rest for the wicked, am still working on many projects. But this gets me ever-closer getting an agent. Fingers crossed!

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

I Can't Stop Laughing

This is the Slap Chop. If you hadn't seen the infomercial before, there is a point where Vince says "You're gonna LOVE my nuts!" before chopping them.

Second, Vince, the Slap Chop spokesperson is also the ShamWow spokesperson (I have one and it rocks!) and was somewhat recently arrested for punching a prostitute that tried to bite off his tongue (ick, not that we didn't already know he was insane from these infomercials). And now, the remix. My favorite is that lady at the end who is so happy she has a Slap Chop.

Thank you BT!